Monday, December 29, 2008

Beans, Beans, The Comical Fruit!

The Beans are BACK, and you won't need any Pepto for these babies.

From the farthest corner of the universe, Beanworld's 'Chow'-munching race of beans have re-emerged into the world of comics for their latest romp since the 1990's in Dark Horse's Beanworld Holiday Special.

Creator Larry Marder has harvested Beanworld into an eco-system bustling with lovable, playful nuggets (who, frankly, I want to keep as pets - especially the Pod’lPool Cuties. So I keep a few lentils in a cage on my desk, big deal).

Find everything you need to know about the Tales of the Beanworld comic series and this most exciting new release at Larry Marder's blog or here at the Beanworld Wiki. You can also follow Marder and his clan on MySpace and Facebook - who knew beans were so technologically advanced?

Read more!

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Saturday, December 27, 2008

A Brief Life Update in the Ancient Japanese Poetry form of Haiku

Threw up for three days.
Then painted nails "whore-y" red.
Got sweet bling from Luce!

Wow, that ranks as one of the worst Haiku poems ever. Let's try again.

Vomit everywhere.
My nails look like a hooker's.
Unicorn jewels rule!

Still bad. Sigh, I give up.

Click "Read More" to find out what I'm currently reading!! HINT: It involves Bryan Talbot and it rhymes with Malice Son Blunder Sand. Whaaaaaat??

Doyeee it's Alice in Sunderland: An Entertainment! This is my very FIRST time reading it, and I'm already foaming at the mouth at page 5.

Here's the typical lazy-man synopsis:

Alice in Sunderland
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Alice in Sunderland: An Entertainment is a graphic novel by comics writer and artist Bryan Talbot. It explores the links between Lewis Carroll and the Sunderland area, with wider themes of history, myth and storytelling — and the truth about what happened to Sid James on stage at the Sunderland Empire Theatre.


The artwork for the main cover was by graphic artist Jordan Smith. His daughter, Kaya Anna Lawson (Smith) is the model for Alice. She is featured on the front cover as Tenniel's Alice, as well as inside the book[1] as her normal self.

The work relates local history. It focuses upon the eponymous city, but also covers other towns and cities in North East England, such as Newcastle upon Tyne, Durham and Hartlepool. Local legends and tales are documented, including The Lambton Worm and the monkey hanged in Hartlepool. In parallel, Talbot relates some history of comics in Britain, with occasional pastiches of other artist's styles and a guest page by Leo Baxendale

It is published in the UK by Jonathan Cape, and in the US by Dark Horse.

Read more!

Monday, December 22, 2008

Pow! Bam! Whaam! OUCH!

Random, yes. Just wanted to share with everyone what Lucy Vonne got me for Hanukkah: Ouch! Comic Strip Bandages. Now I can outfit my entire body with comic book phrases such as "Bam!" "Aargh!" and "Pow!"

It's taken my strongest will to avoid "accidents" like: "oopsie, I decided to wear 4-inch heels with no traction to walk through the accumulating slush/black ice," and "what is this loose razor doing out in the open like this? I should bring it over to the trash can while clutching it tightly in my bare hand," and even "whoops, I threw myself knees-first onto the linoleum floor/gravel."

Don't click "Read More." Really, there's nothing else here.
Read more!

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Look What I Just Got! The Absolute Sandman, Vol. 1 Hardcover!!!

Jahfurry, you've outdone yourself once again. I can't believe what I just received in the mail: THIS!

For you n00bz who don't know, Neil Gaiman is one of the most prolific writers/story-magicians of our lifetime; and The Sandman series is one of his most celebrated works. It's a comic book series from Vertigo, published as a monthly serial; this hardcover volume that I now proudly own is the collection of the first twenty issues.

This is also amazingly timely, because just last month I attended the CBLDF (Comic Book Legal Defense Fund - event celebrating the 20th anniversary of The Sandman. The event featured talented voice actors performing selected scenes from the books while the pages were projected on-screen, something I've never seen done before and REALLY enjoyed. Gaiman also humored us with a Q & A afterwards, and shared an off-the-record new book that will be coming out very soon. On that same note, you really should check out the CBLDF, because they put on ridiculously marvelous events just like this ALL THE TIME. Go to the website, become a member...donate!

Anyway, if you can't reach me for the next few weeks it's because I'm hunched over this beauty. Happiness!

Click "Read More" for a bit of the lazy-man's summary (Wikipedia) of Gaiman's The Sandman series.


The Sandman's main character is Morpheus, the Lord of Dreams, who is essentially the anthropomorphic personification of dreams. At the start of the series, Morpheus is captured by an occult ritual and held prisoner for 70 years. Morpheus escapes in the modern day and after revenging himself upon his captors, sets about rebuilding his kingdom, which has fallen into disrepair in his absence. Gaiman himself has summarized the plot of the series (in the foreword to Endless Nights) as "The Lord of Dreams learns that one must change or die, and makes his decision."

The character's initially haughty and often cruel manner begins to soften after his years of imprisonment at the start of the series, but the challenge of undoing past sins and changing old ways is an enormous one for a being who has been set in his ways for billions of years. In its beginnings, the series was a very dark horror comic. Later, the series evolves into an elaborate fantasy series, incorporating elements of classical and contemporary mythology, ultimately placing its protagonist in the role of a tragic hero.

The story-lines primarily take place in the Dreaming, Morpheus's realm, and the waking world, with occasional visits to other domains, such as Hell, Faerie, Asgard, and the domains of the other Endless. Many used the contemporary United States of America and the United Kingdom as a backdrop. The DC Universe was the official setting of the series, but well-known DC characters and places were rarely featured after 1990, with one exception: Lyta Hall, formerly Fury of the 1980s super-team Infinity Inc., figures prominently in the "Kindly Ones" story arc. Various characters from the series did appear in other DC Universe comics however, including an appearance by Daniel during Grant Morrison's JLA run. Most of the storylines take place in modern times, but many short stories are set in the past, taking advantage of the immortal nature of many of the characters, and deal with historical individuals and events.

For the full Wikipedia article, click here.

Read more!

*sniffle sniffle* ACHOO!

This will be a short, pointless entry, as I'm completely abusing my blog and using it as a vehicle to complain about my head cold. I've got so much work to do and I can't think clearly. And I don't think I've ever sneezed so much in my life, although...I admit I enjoy sneezing every now and then. Feels funny. It's really the nose-blowing and the voice modulation that's frustrating; I sound like a recently-changed transvestite with Down's Syndrome.

Two cups of coffee (Bustelo ONLY) and my brain's still foggy - which is why I may need to head to the coffee shop next door and do it Italian-style: take shots of espresso. I could handle throwing back a couple of those; if I can do Patron or Jager I most certainly can handle THAT.

I think I've actually hit the "coffee" wall: complete immunity to the effects of caffeine. Does this mean I need to find some other stimulant?

Achoo. Achoo. Okay, gotta get ready for work now.

No need to click "Read More" - there's nothing else.
Read more!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Adri Leya and the Case of the Purloined Perception!

Now that I’ve dipped my big toe into the world of Alan Moore’s comic series, Promethea (see previous blog entry for deets), I have a couple of questions. Okay, only one.

Where did my IMAGINATION go?

As an offbeat, introspective kid (growing into an even further offbeat, mildly/pleasantly disturbed young adult) my mind swirled with magic, story fodder and faith in different, expansive worlds. I believed in unicorns for real. At way too old an age, I would creep into the woods behind my house and sit, waiting for a unicorn to approach. Sometimes, I tried planting little flowers or even singing, hoping to affix a horned beast to my childhood posse.

We all know how THAT story ended.

SIDENOTE: One day, however, I did happen to stumble upon an odd, magical discovery at the large rock where I would sit: a fully intact pair of monarch butterfly wings. I still have those wrapped in Saran, tucked away in the treasure drawer or box that every girl had (or still has – guilty). Among the other treasures: a loose Mother of Pearl button; a rock from the top of Mount Monadnock in New Hampshire, the first mountain I’d climbed; a fistful of realllly old chestnuts; Mancala beads (remember that game?); random foreign coins and sea glass.

Even after the Unicorn Rejection Period of my life, my imagination trudged on. I would write for hours - short stories, poetry and attempts at “chapter books.” I wrote the endings first, then took a stab at the beginnings; very rarely would I make it to the middle. I have, thusly, a pretty impressive collection of story twists with mediocre intros.

I’m proud to say that, over time, my little yarns became increasingly disconcerting, and clearly influenced from the breed of mystery novels I was getting my hands on from used-bookstore scavenging. Stories like dizygotic twins experiencing death telepathically; women with personality disorders who believed they were Biblical characters, or the ghost of a young girl searching to be brought back to life to exact revenge on humanity. I think I was about ten years old at the time.

Ask me to write something fictional now, I'll sit for hours on it. I'll sift through any strange dreams I might have had, books I've read. I'll come up with mind-blowing, incredible ideas - and then realize they're actually the stories of Narnia, or X-Men, or Dahl's Matilda, or something.

When you’re reading a book, or a graphic novel, or a poem or see an amazing illustration or piece or art, do you ever wonder how the HELL they did it? Are you reminded of the times in your life where ideas like that grew, and blossomed and were nurtured by outlets like coloring, or painting, or penning – even typing on your shitty typewriter, armed with White Out? How do these men and women SUSTAIN the visceral force to construct entirely NEW worlds and ideas?

Landlords. Cable + Phone + Internet. Heat, hot water. Supermarkets. Department stores. Deadlines. Taxes. THEY have stolen my imagination! This massive, seemingly inexorable new breed of Super Villains have succeeded in pilfering my punch!

They must be stopped. MUST be apprehended! But HOW?

Read more!

Monday, December 15, 2008

Look What I Just Got! Alan Moore's "Promethea" Comic Series

Ridiculously late, shouldn't be writing, blah blah...but I just HAD to tell you that I got some saweeeet reading material in the mail tonight from Jahfurry: the entire Promethea series created by Alan Moore. Super excited. Got to go to bed now - but how CAN I??

Click "Read More" for the lazy man's summary - a clip from Wikipedia.

Here's some of the Wikipedia article on it in case you need to know more!

Promethea is a comic book series created by Alan Moore and J.H. Williams III with Mick Gray, published by America's Best Comics/Wildstorm. Serialized in 32 issues on an irregular schedule from 1999 to 2005, the series explores Moore's ideas about art and magic, combining elements of superhero action, metaphysical theorizing, and psychedelic revelation, all focused on the adventures of Promethea, a metafictional character that possesses magical power over the real world. Promethea is also notable for wide-ranging experimentation in visual style and storytelling technique on the part of Williams and Moore.

Promethea has been organized into five books. Books 1 and 2 mainly deal with Sophie Bangs becoming Promethea, while Books 3 and 4 show Promethea/Sophie working her way through all the Sephiroth of the Qabbalistic Tree of Life, passing beyond death and the Immateria before returning to earth for a confrontation with Stacia. In Book 5, Promethea brought on the Apocalypse, the end of the world - or the entire ABC universe, to be precise - not by destroying it physically, but by tenderly introducing its inhabitants to a new world of imagination, wonder, beauty, belief, and acceptance. Here Promethea truly delves deep into metafiction - the title character addresses the reader directly in her explanation of the Apocalypse, and points out that she is fiction, and fiction can be magic and be believed.

Read more!

Saturday, December 13, 2008

My New Boyfriend!

Hands off, beotches. Oh, and you don't need to click "Read More" because there's nothing else.
Read more!

Thursday, December 11, 2008

PDA with my PDA : Blackberry vs. iPhone

I'm Anti-iPhone. There, I said it. Yeah, I'm weird. Yeah, I'm missing out on cool applications like "Virtual Beer" and "Tap Tap Dance" and "Virtual Monkey in a Bubble Going Down Slides."

But I'm not missing out on my cheek accidentally calling that dude I met last month at the bar that I said I'd call but never did. I'm not missing the grease spots on the screen after I eat a delicious slice of ricotta and broccoli pizza from Danny's Pizzeria around the block. I'm really not missing the muscle strain I'll develop from having to crane my neck for all those flip-flopping, sliding, draggable screen-thingies.

And no other handheld device has ever been haunted by Apple founder and billionaire Steve Jobs, which says a lot (although, having your phone haunted by Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer would be cool, and - I'll admit it - arousing).

Frankly, I'm a Blackberry kinda girl. Give me email, internet, and a scroll wheel. Plus, those Blackberry device names are sexy - Pearl, Curve, Bold, Storm; they sound like the monikers of hulking male exotic dancers, glistening with body oil and man sweat from sexydancetime exertions.

The Blackberry Bold, Storm and Curve, respectively.

So, while all you iPhone users are flitting your greasy appendages over that touchy-whatever-screen, I'll be having practical PDA with my shiny new hunk of a PDA.

Read more!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Comix Review: Army@Love by Rick Veitch

A tale of steamy romance, thrills, battles and non-stop adrenaline; no, this isn’t Desperate Housewives. It’s Army@Love, the monthly series from comic icon Rick Veitch and Vertigo/DC, pairing the hilarity and irony of U.S. war politics with fiery soap opera-esque dramatics.

Set in the not-so-distant future where war continues to thrive in the Middle Eastern region of “Afbaghistan,” Army@Love spins the satirical tale of an American government roping in recruits with the marketing of a perpetual ‘Spring Break’-style army, where the booze flows, the sex is wild and cell phones still get service, even in the midst of battle.

The first six issues, condensed in Army@Love Vol. 1: The Hot Zone Club, introduces us to the outrageous cast of characters, and continues their stories in the following collection, Army@Love: Operation Pwned.

Among heated extramarital affairs, hypnotist magicians, malevolent Wiccan charms and gun-toting robots, Army@Love offers a mix of the ridiculous amongst potent social commentary – and it’s a veritable M16 blast to read.

They have it on for ten bucks here - check it out!

Read more!

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Wocka wocka, fools.

A lot has changed since we last spoke, my friends.

1) It is now WINTER.

2) Lucy Vonne now has her own blog, part of the Blogtime family, called Sexy Blogtime! Visit her spot for all that is sexy - toys, testicles, and most of all, trouble.

3) I have a new freelance job, working with the ultimate of PR, social networking and marketing gurus, Jeff "Jahfurry" Newelt (check out some dirt on him here). We work with the best of comic book writers, artists and graphic novelists, in addition to non-profits, performers and other select clients. I've FINALLY found a job at which I can get paid for reading comic books all day, and mama likes.

4) I have long bangs that I wear swept to the side.

5) There's probably a lot more.

And here's what hasn't changed....

1) I am still 30lbs overweight and I think that's swell.

2) Lucy Vonne and I re-signed our lease for another year, so we're still the lovingest of roommates you've ever met. Not to mention the ridiculously expansive porn collection she's accumulated - I've had to explain that one away to the couple of guys I've had over for dinner dates. You'll find "Cuntourage" right next to "Liar Liar" on our DVD shelf.

3) I still don't have a dog. And I said to Lucy the other night that maybe if we had a dog, we would be happy all the time.

4) I'm still painting my fingernails in fall colors and I shall do that all year round.

5) I'm still a sexy Jew.

6) Still poor.

7) Still denying that I listen to Paramore.

So there you have it, a lil' recap for yo ass. Expect more from me sooner than later, lovers.

Read more!
Newer Posts span.fullpost {display:none;} Older Posts Home