Friday, August 29, 2008

Home Shwet Home: One Night in Suburby, MA

After a six freakin' hour bus ride from NYC to Boston on Thursday (Labor Day traffic - nice one, Adri Leya), I arrived home just in time to celebrate my lil' bro's 22nd bday. Had a fantastic dinner with Jake and the parentals, and I cheerfully gorged on more than I have all week. We started with tapas: yucca and chick pea fries with a spicy mango dipping sauce; then mixed greens with farmer's cheese, grilled pears and a honey pepper vinaigrette; and then Jake and I split a pizzette with goat cheese, roasted red peppers and basil, and he had lamb sausage on his half. A day's worth of calories in one meal? Yes. That's how we do.

More pics and stuff after the jump. Click "Read More!"

Then, back home for birthday treats and gift exchange! Check out these chocolate covered strawberries my Mom and Dad got instead of a cake - they have mini tuxedoes on them!

After mauling those dapper berries, I gave Jake his gifts - a Miyazaki DVD he wanted, Whisper of the Heart, and (my favorite thing ever) a Wee Ninja by Shawnimal Smith. Look, this is us playing with it! Booyah, my nailz is STILL lookin' pro.

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Tuesday, August 26, 2008

FYI: Pro Nailz

Did mah nails last night. Hollerrrrr!

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Monday, August 25, 2008

Adri Leya vs. Cara: Movie Time!

While Lucy Vonne's away for the most of the week, I'm been filling the void with my darling friend Cara - not that the cardboard cutout of Lucy Vonne isn't doing the trick, but she's really just so quiet. Today, both Cara and I had the day off, so we decided to have a movie marathon and pick one out for each mood. Turns out that Cara and I have drastically different taste in film.

Quick Mad Lib Bio on Cara: When Cara ________ here to New York from San Diego in May, she felt ________. She loves _______ and singing to her favorite _______. Her favorite food? _______ of course! She's a beauty expert, certified hair colorist, and ______!

Click "Read More" to see Adri Leya and Cara's movie picks for what everz your mood!

Cara's Movie Picks vs. Adri Leya's

When You're Feeling Down:

Adri Leya: Requiem for a Dream. I like to keep the shitty mood intact by watching drug addicts and hookers destroy themselves to a killer soundtrack. I'm going to go cut myself now.

Cara: Dirty Dancing. When I'm in a funk, I like to get funky!

When You're Feeling Romantic:

Cara: 50 First Dates. I find this movie easy to relate to, because I've literally been on fifty first dates. Unlike the movie, however, they've been with different men - and involve walks of shame and sobbing.

Adri Leya: Natural Born Killers or True Romance. Nothing says 'I love you' like psychotics on a killing rampage -and they do it together. Aww...why can't I have that?

When You're Feeling Silly:

Adri Leya: Pee Wee's Big Adventure or Uncle Buck. I don't consider you a friend if you haven't seen either of these. Needless to say, gigantic pancakes make me feel great.

Cara: Dumb and Dumber. Because the Soup du Jour sounds delicious.

When You Feel Like Scaring Yourself:

Adri Leya: The Mothman Prophecies or She's the Man. Oh, and that French horror film I saw in the artsy theater, L'Interieur. If you want to frighten yourself into speechlessness, pick up this winner.

Cara: I'm like a 5-year-old, so even some scenes in Disney movies still scare the shit out of me. We'll play it safe and go with The Care Bear's Movie.

When You Feel Like Being Cerebral:

Adri Leya: Momento. WTF is going on here? And on a serious note, The Fountain is one of my all time favorite thinkers.

Cara: The Usual Suspects and American Beauty. Kevin Spacey in both - coincidence? I think not.

When You Feel Like Watching a Chick Flick:

Cara: Steel Magnolias. Sigh. "Our ability to accessorize is what separates us from the animals." [Editor's Note: Cara just pulled several quotes from this movie out of her ass - from memory.]

Adri Leya: Kung Fu Hustle, Boondock Saints or Reservoir Dogs. Ergh fiiiiine - you know me, I abhor chick flicks. But if I must, hands down, Mean Girls. That movie is so underrated.

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Friday, August 22, 2008

Yo, Ponyo!

Nerds, brace yourself! You're most likely already aware of the new Studio Ghibli project, Gake no ue no Ponyo or, Ponyo on the Cliff By the Sea, written and directed by Hayao Miyazaki. The film was release already in Japan this past July, and now I'm anxiously awaiting its UK release, which isn't happening until April 3, 2009. Damn time - I need some mufuggin' 1.21 Jigowatts.

Click "Read More" for the Ponyo plot synopsis and Japanese trailer.

Per usual, I'm too busy/lazy to paraphrase the plot, so here it is from Wikipedia:

The plot is centered on a girl fish who runs away from her home in the sea. She ends up stranded on the shore and is rescued by Sōsuke, a five year old boy who lives on a cliff. Sōsuke names her Ponyo (pronounced "Po-Nyo", not "Pon-Yo") after taking a great liking to her, and promises to protect her forever. Meanwhile, her father, Fujimoto, is looking for his daughter, upset that she ran away. He calls his wave demons and has them take Ponyo back to him, since it seems he has an aversion to land. Sōsuke is heartbroken by this, and goes home crying to his mother, Risa. Risa tries to cheer him up, but to no avail.

Ponyo and her father have a confrontation, where Ponyo refuses her father to call her Brünnhilde and declares she is Ponyo, and voices her want to become human, because she has started to fall in love with Sōsuke. Her father silences her with difficulty and goes to summon Ponyo's mother. Meanwhile, Ponyo, with the help of her sisters, breaks away from her father's barriers, and mixes herself in with his magic, becoming a human girl. This causes an inbalance in the world, which in turn results in a tsunami. Riding on the waves of the tsunami, Ponyo goes back to visit Sōsuke. Risa, Sōsuke, and Ponyo stay the night at Sōsuke's house, hoping the tsunami will be over, whereupon Risa leaves the house to check up on the residents of the nursing home she works at.

Granmammare, Ponyo's mother, arrives to Fujimoto's submarine. Fujimoto notices the moon is deorbited and the satellites are falling like shooting stars. Granmammare declares that if Sōsuke and Ponyo succeed a trial, Ponyo can live as a human, and the world order will be restored.

Sōsuke and Ponyo wake up to find that the most of the land has submerged. Risa has not come home yet, so, with the help of Ponyo's magic, they turn Sōsuke's toy boat to life size and set out to find Risa.
After going through a tunnel, where Ponyo loses her human form and returns to a fish, they arrive to the nursing home and meet Granmammare. Granmammare asks Sōsuke if he can love even if Ponyo is a fish or mermaid. Sōsuke answers he likes all form of Ponyo. Granmammare allows her to become human.

PONYO PONYO! So friggin' cute.

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Thursday, August 21, 2008

Bobby Trendy, Is That You? Cut it Out!

Lucy Vonne and I have reached a new level of friendship. We sat down, had a heart-to-heart, and decided to make custom cardboard standups of eachother so that when one of us is away, we can fill the void. Not to say that I won't try to hump my paper doppleganger, or even Lucy Vonne's (cardboard smells really good. Really good.). While we're at it, we also decided to get a new roommate, and we're now deciding between Fabio and and Lorenzo Lamas. Or both - one for each...ahhh, the sleepless nights to come!

Click "Read More" to see some of my favorite cutouts/masturbation fodder.

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Wednesday, August 20, 2008

This Week's News: Adri Leya Gains Weight, Lucy Vonne Goes on Talk Show?

I haven’t blogged in over three days. As you can see from my last post, I got a little overwhelmed by my current “career” situation and had a minor, shall we say, motivational breakdown. Which means, yes, I punished myself gastronomically: pizza, peanut butter M&Ms, Ben and Jerry’s Chocolate Fudge Brownie Ice Cream, mozzarella sticks, chips and guac, pretzels, hummus, burritos. You name it – I ate that mofo. And if you know me, you know that most of what I consume is either fruit, vegetable, or grain; organic, vegetarian, clean....Klingon. And coffee. LOTS of coffee.

Click "Read More" for the rest of my self-loathing, this week's top news items, and find out why Lucy Vonne's going to be on a national talk show next week. WHAAAAA??

Yeah, it’s not drugs or booze, but it’s still so bad for my body; I feel bloated, sluggish, and 5lbs heavier – I gained a pound a day, to be exact. Sweeeeet, especially after being so proud of this past year’s 25 lb weight loss. I even popped Super Size me into the DVD player to snap myself out of this bizarre slump – but it made me hungry. I ended up munching on some vegan lemon squares and pretzels. WTF!!

Anyway, I did better today, but not as well as I usually do. We’ll see how quickly I can drop the 5 lbs – by this Monday I’m hoping to get this gut back into six-pack form. Like it was before, clearly.

On to some NEWS! This Week's Headlines:

Adri Leya Paints Fingernails Purple
Yeah, I just gave myself a manicure for the first time in a month. I'm sexy.

CitiBank Calls Adri Leya 5 Times This Week to Collect
Don't ask me how much. Gulp.

Adri Leya Scans "Adult" Section of Craigslist for Discrete "Jobs" - Then Remembers Morals
That one explains itself.

Lucy Vonne to Appear on TYRA BANKS Show Next Week As Panelist in Roundtable Sex Discussion
Yep, you heard me! Looks like all that Sexy Time has paid off! Lucy Vonne has been selected to grace the Tyra Banks Show with her presence to discuss her views on sexuality with Tyra and a few others with differing views - I'm expecting to see some majah dramz. Will blog more about this as it gets closer...

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Thursday, August 14, 2008

Cupcakes! Cupcakes!

This one's for Lucy Vonne, who has a penchant for delicious cupcake treats. These confections are after my soul - decorated with video game characters and cartoons? Hello, weight gain!

Here are some photos I found on from hello naomi on Flickr. Click "Read More" to see some of my favorites!

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Rollins With My Homies

I love Henry Rollins. Everything about him - his crazy eyes, jutting neck veins (when he gets angry - which is like, 82% of the time), the beautiful spray of spit as he rants. Ok, yeah, and his music. Sure, he's verifiably off his friggin' rocker, but that's why I adore him so - he's a damaged genius with a really, really bad temper. I saw him on his Spoken Word Tour here in NYC last year and literally almost got kicked out for taking secret video footage for future masturbation fodder.

Click "Read More"!

And in true Rollins fashion, he's going on tour again this year to celebrate the end of a Bush era, called the Recountdown Tour 2008 - and I'm GOING bitches. Tickets are already closed for presale, but don't you worry, I will be on that like nasty drunk hookers on Flava Flav's junk. If anyone knows a way to get these tickets for NYC on October 30, let me know. I will probably do just about anything for them. I'm serious.

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Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Coolest Sushi. Ever.

If you've gone out with me for sushi before, you know that I'm a HUGE fan of Japanese, but only eat vegetable rolls - avocado and cucumber maki, sweet potato tempura roll, asparagus - deeelicious! Yes, I know, it technically isn't sushi, but I can't seem to wrap my mouth around the idea of raw fish. It's slimy. And...uncooked. Raw, even.

But I think someone has finally found a way to get me to swallow even the ghastliest of sea creatures - and that's to make sushi that looks really, really pretty, or like cartoons. I have a grown-up palate.

Click "Read More" for some photos of the most awesome sushi I've ever seen.

Shrunken Heads Sushi!


I'm a Mac fan, obvs, but come on.

Pretty damn cute. I will eat you!

HERRO Kitty!

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Sunday, August 10, 2008

Russian Bombings in...Georgia??

I hate to be a statistic (unless it's like, top percent of hottest Jews in the country), but I can't avoid this one. I am apparently one of the many, MANY Americans who could be categorized as geographically retarded. I'm not the type of person who can readily admit that I'm wrong (because, well, come on, I'm usually not. Ever.). But when scanning the interwebs the other day to catch up on the newsins, I saw the headline "Georgia: Russians Dropped Bomb on Village"; and I was like, whaaaaaa?? Why would Russia want to bomb Georgia? Were they put off by Ludacris's last album? Were the last few batches of their peaches extremely mealy?

Click "Read More" read more!!

Turns out, Georgia is actually the name of an Eastern European country. Who knew? Here's a blurb from a Wikipedia article on the place:

Georgia ([ˈdʒɔrdʒə] (help·info); Georgian: საქართველო, Sakartvelo), formerly the Republic of Georgia, is a transcontinental country partially in Eastern Europe and partially in Southwest Asia in the Caucasus region. It is bordered to the north by the Russian Federation, to the east by Azerbaijan, to the west across the Black Sea by Ukraine, to the south by Armenia and to the southwest by Turkey.The territory of Georgia covers 69,700 km² and is influenced by a temperate seasonal climate. Georgia’s population is 4.4 million in the territories controlled by the central government of Georgia, nearly 84% of whom are ethnic Georgians.

Now, as you news-watchers know, Georgia is involved in the South Ossessia War - a military conflict between Russia, Georgia and South Ossessia. Wikipedia also has a great, informative article on the war here. I watched a brief clip on CNN of President Bush addressing the situation, but all I heard were Charlie Brown woh wohs.

Not to make light of this devastating situation, but I found it disturbing not only that there was a war going on, but also that I had no effing clue this place existed. And that's really embarrassing. What's worse, is that not ONE of my peers knew about it either.

I guess the thing is that once we're out of high school and college, nobody's really feeding us any current events or geographical updates - it's up to us as individuals to stay on point with the world. But with all the other important stuff we need to know (sample sales, Lindsay Lohan's sexual preference, that weird rash on my neck), who has time?

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Thursday, August 7, 2008

How to Look Like White Trash: Tips from Steriogram's Tyson Kennedy

Top 3 Tips for Men on How to Look Like White Trash:

1. Don't shave. Especially if you have a patchy beard - and never, ever trim. You pussy.

2. You must have at least 3 shitty cars that you're working on simultaneously in your front yard. Make sure to get that grease good and rubbed up on your skin.

3. If you drive, drive a matte black Holden Commodore.*

*Tyson clarified that this is an Australian white trash car (he's from NZ) - the equivalent to the American classic shit pickup. He also told me that in AU, their white trash are called "Westies" or "Bogans." Can't ever have too many new and wonderful social slurs!

Click "Read More" to see Tyson busting a rhyme in Steriograms's "White Trash" music video, and "Walkie Talkie Man," nominated for four MTV Music Awards.

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OMFG: World's First Eyeball Tattoo? GAH!! NEEDLES IN EYE!!!

I don't mean to gross any of you out, but I had to share this with you - it's one of those things that makes you want to propel yourself onto the floor and flutter your hands a bit, then vomit a lot. Everywhere.

Corneal tattooing has been used before for people that have had trauma to the eye, but never as a form of body mod - until this crazy Canadian mofo decided to turn the whites of his eyes to turquoise. Pauly Unstoppable, a Toronto resident, is the "brave" man who had a needle plunged FORTY times into his eyeball to turn it completely blue. Sweet jesus! This brings back memories of the childhood nightmare I had about carving a pumpkin and then accidentally stabbing myself in the eye. Shiver.

Click "Read More" if you can stand to look at the pictures.





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Monday, August 4, 2008

Finding My Religion - in Comic Books

I totally shouldn't be blogging right now, since I have a crapload of actual paid writing to do - but you know me, when it comes to superheroes, I lose all control. And use of my bodily functions. Oh shoot, I peed!

Anyway, while researching for something else, I stumbled upon this website that actually groups comic book superheroes by RELIGION. Somebody actually took the time to research all these comic books, determine each character's religion, then create a database of all the info with over 8,000 names. I should probably meet this guy - I bet he's very attentive in the sack. Or a virgin.

Check out the website here: and another interesting site here that put a collage together based on the religious groups.

You don't need to click "Read More" this time, since there's nothing else. See! I'm BUSY!!!
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